Phew!

It's seven minutes past seven pm on the fourteenth of April 2011, which means two things:

Y Sweet Valley Confidential was published in the UK today.

YY The shops are now shut.

Seriously, doesn't the cover of the Sweet Valley prom novel look like it should have been on a Point Horror book? Speaking of which, Point Horror! RL Stine! The next part of my ongoing teen nostalgia? Yes!

Thank God that, contrary to one of my previous posts, there is a Kindle edition.

Cannot believe it took me until this hour to remember.

It goes without saying I'm holding the future Princess William of Windsor, and the amount of space she currently occupies in my life, entirely responsible for my late recall.

Laughing all the way to the Abbey, no doubt.

Have I mentioned she can't be called 'Princess Catherine' as she's not a Princess in her own right? So it's either the 'Duchess of whichever area the Queen grants them as a wedding present, hopefully not Windsor,' or 'Princess William.'

We'll be calling it "rubbish."

A broken tiara on the side of the road. Princess William, this is probably not your future.

Anyway, gotta dash. Spending the night catching up with the Wakefield twins.

Another Day, Another Kate Middleton Doll

I take it everyone's already seen Franklin Mint's Kate Middleton doll?

It costs a not inconsiderable $195, and does a pretty good job of Americanising our soon-to-be Princess.

Well, there's a new doll in town, and you can pick her up from Regent Street's own imaginarium of horrors Hamley's. The Princess Catherine Engagement Doll, to give it it's full title, costs £35 and even has accessories: a fascinator, court shoes, a clutch bag, and of course, an enormous engagement ring.

Hell, she's even travelled. Here, courtesy of Caters News Agency, are a few shots that could have come from her Facebook photo albums.*

If the dolls had been available when I was writing the book, I'd have definitely got on and made it some tiny Middleton outfits to model for the pictures. Oh-some as Michelle Bikini might say.**

*Genuinely cannot believe there is someone else as lame as me out there, and they spent time on this. It -the photos, not the doll- is amazing.
**Read: "not awesome". We also call really ugly things 'Fergalicious.'

Evening Herald Interview

Above: The interview I did with the Evening Herald, originally published on Saturday March 19th. Click to enlarge, as per.

Terrible/Amazing News

As I'll be doing radio commentary for the Royal Wedding, the Chez Purple party is off.

It does mean I get to spend the day in here though.

It's the official media platform that's been set up opposite Buckingham Palace. It's full of mini TV and radio studios. Photo by Mishal Husain, BBC News Reporter and all-round nice lady who interviewed me for BBC World last week. She'll be in there too.

An Invitation

An Invitation to the Royal Wedding.

It looks like I may be working on the day Prince William finally makes an honest woman of the lovely Kate but, in case I'm not, I'm issuing a partially open invitation:

Ladies' Night and Day at Chez Purple: 

A Celebration to Mark the Sacred Nuptials of Prince William and Miss Catherine of Middleton.

The fun will start at around 8 o'clock on April 28th when ladies (it's a girls' only event sorry, well, girls and gays at a push) are invited to come and partake in a sleepover party that will see them toast the soon-to-be married couple with champagne (OK, Cava, and possibly towards the end of the night, Lambrini) and assemble suitably elegant chapeaus to wear to the next day's events (which we will otherwise be watching in the living room in our pyjamas while eating cucumber sandwiches).

Materials for the assembling of hats will be supplied.

Bring your own Bolly!

Do RSVP!

I'd have a street party and hat making event but, you know, people might see me.

Just Showing Off

The book, displayed as part of Waterstone's Royal Wedding Memorabilia display in Milton Keynes. Loving that Kate and William picture bunting.

Number 28 (it's number 27 now!) in WH Smith's book chart! Nice that my chart placement very nearly matches my age, no? It's not half price, lest you be wondering, but I think there's a £5 discount.

Irish Examiner piece

This interview appeared in the Irish Examiner on Monday.

Thank you to the lovely Paula Burns, who writes the fabulous fashion blog StyleBible.ie and Siobhan Cronin for making it happen!

Hello, London

(Photo taken from Johnny Cupcakes blog)

I've lapsed from blogging this week having been sent to London to do some promotion for 'Kate Style'. I intend to put more info about what I've been up to on here as it comes along- that way not embarrassing myself if it doesn't happen- but in summary:

Monday: An interview in the Irish Examiner (to be uploaded asap), Meetings, a Twitter competition courtesy of Marie-Claire magazine's UK edition (I couldn't promote it as, for some reason, my iPhone censors certain websites, refusing to allow me access), and a mention on Irish personality Ryan Tubridy's breakfast time radio show. 

He mispronounced my name -entirely reasonable, my friend Sophie nearly crashed her car at hearing it, and my cousin Karen lost her chance at nationwide fame when she refused to go on the show after texting them to verify the fact that I am in fact Irish. 

Lunch, courtesy of Big Daddy, was at Scott's- have the halibut! 

Tuesday: Some recording for a TV show that will air on a well-known news channel in the run up to the Royal Wedding. Filming, it turns out, is much less scary than it initially sounds. Thanks to James and Monita for sorting the whole thing out, and to Black Alice for spending the afternoon walking round the city with me, before stopping off at what remain my fave food place in the city, The Diner on Ganton Street and my favourite confusingly named non-food place, Johnny Cupcakes, around the corner on Carnaby Street.

(a selection of earrings available from Johnny Cupcakes)

Wednesday: I spent the morning recording a series of interviews for BBC Radio. I think I can confirm these as some of them have already been broadcast. I was, some of you may be aware, a horrible unusable mess the first time I went on radio. This time I really enjoyed myself. Thanks to Pete Bestwick for arranging it all.

Today: I'm off, it's sunny and the shops are open. You know where to find me.

Francine Pascal Forever

The (much better) US cover of the book

This month sees the European publication of the much-hyped (in the US anyway) Sweet Valley Confidential, a tome that follows the Wakefield twins and their classmates into adulthood. While I'm gutted that there's no Kindle edition available- I just don't like carrying books around anymore- I am looking forward to reading it.

I was a massive Sweet Valley Twins fan as a kid. The TV show was broadcast when I was in high school myself and I even watched that even though I was strictly speaking too old and the appearance of one of Winkie and Blinkie from The Basketball Diaries as Elizabeth Wakefield kinda freaked me out. No way was Liz blowing poetry-loving junkie Catholic school boys from the LES, you know?

(0:14 for a glimpse of Wakefield)

And also hoping that this likely false report, claiming Diablo Cody is writing the script for the new SVH movie, is true.

I ♥ Roadkill

The Marxist is turning out to be an excellent gift giver. He even (sort of) bought me a raccoon for my birthday.

Twitch is almost certainly the only kind of pet I'm capable of looking after. A Roadkill Toy, he sadly lost his life in a head on collision with a green Ford Mondeo. I know because his death certificate, which was included in the body bag he arrived in, said so.


Also included: an 'I ♥ Roadkill' bumper sticker.


No idea who first came up with these macabre mammalians but I love them, and will be adding Twitch's friends Grind and Splodge to my collection as soon as possible.

Underneath The Covers

I've posted these once already but, you know, like all the best things they bear repeating so, without further ado, here's what  'Kate Style' (now available in WH Smiths, Waterstones, Easons and on Amazon) looks like on the inside:

Nooooooo!!!

If I ever owe her money Barbara's decided she's gonna put all my shoes and accessories on eBay.

(NB That's not my accessories closet above. I've used a picture of the excellent Ruthie Davies' shoe closet instead, in the hope of throwing B off track).

Calendar Boys

This week I received what is almost certainly the best gift a lapsed Catholic could ask for:

My very own copy of Calendario Romano 2011, a calendar annually sold by the Vatican. Yes, it's official and yes, the men featured have each apparently found real-life ecclesiastical vocations that will not involve the modelling industry.

There's also a tonne of Vatican-related info at the back, including a list of every Pontiff ever appointed, that will doubtless come in handy when I one day go on to win Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?

The Greatest Craft Project Of Our Time?

This rather exciting tome arrived on my doormat today:

My plan is to learn how to knit, make all 25 of the breeds within its covers, then coerce Hollie into to enacting Crafts (geddit?), a woolly tribute to a certain well-known dog competition with me.

I may use a besuited Ken doll to play the judge. I may also the film the "competition" and upload it to Youtube.

Consider yourselves warned.

Bulldog:

Basset Hound:

Poodle:

A bevy of Working Dogs:

I am especially excited by the inclusion of Collies and Corgis, which mean I can knit a tribute to Phoebe, our half-Corgi half-Collie guard pup (pictured here in her LA Skate brat hoodie).

Oh fucking yes.

Win Copies of 'Kate Style'!

This week one of my favourite gossip fests Reveal magazine are giving away 10 free copies of Kate Style to lucky readers who can answer the question:

In which UK country did Kate and William go to University?

(Hint: click here for a wee prompt).

The competition is on page 96 and looks a little something like this:

Thanks to Reveal's lovely Associate Editor Wendy Rigg for making it happen.

A Yankee In King Arthur's Court

I was named after the girl in this book by Mark Twain. She's kind of cool.

Potentially Embarrassing

I wasn't going to blog this but it seems too amusing not to. Note article about Kate Style, complete with mug shot sized picture of me, next to a potentially embarrassing, much larger headline about a sex offender who preys on boys.